Why Consultants Have A Bad Name

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I’ve always heard two things about IT consultants — 1. they make tons of money, and 2. they don’t know much. In short, I’ve always heard that as often as not, they’re largely unqualified to be advising anyone on anything.

Well, now that I am one, I’ve been paying close attention to my surroundings. I won’t go into what my overall impressions have been since that’d be a few pages worth of text, but I will say that I have witnessed firsthand the idiocy that so many have complained about.

I was at a client recently with a number of other consultants when one of my more “challenged” colleagues piped in with this at the end of the meeting:

Silence. The whole room froze. I was speechless while I tried to find logic in his statement. Panic set in once I realized what he meant to say. After a few moments, one of the more brazen among the client representation says,

The mouthbreather flashes a goofy smile and responds with,

I didn’t know whether to burst into laughter, cry, or start projectile vomiting. I was so embarrassed I could barely do anything but stare at the floor. So, yeah, I’ve seen the stupidity up close and personal.

On a side note, the guy in question is at least trying to better himself — he came into the office today and declared that he’s interested in doing the “Certified Ethnical Hacker” course. I almost asked him if that was some sort of eugenics program, but I didn’t want to waste a joke of that quality.

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